"The Rite" Review

An atheist and an exorcist joining together to fight the forces of evil sounds like a bad sit-com. In fact, it would've been better that way. Instead, it’s the premise behind the supernatural thriller – if you can call it that – The Rite.

The movie, suggested by Matt Baglio's book The Rite: The Making of a Modern Exorcist, is about a would-be atheist who becomes an exorcist after witnessing the effects of demoic possession first-hand.

Michael Kovak (Colin O’Donoghue) is an atheist who joins the seminary so he can get away from the family-owned and operated funeral home. After receiving his undergraduate degree, he tries to resign by claiming to have a crisis of faith, though that was actually his plan all along.

Rather than accept his resignation, the priest in charge of the seminary sends Michael to Rome for two months to take a new course about exorcism being offered by the Vatican; part of a new Vatican initiative to meet the increasing reports of demonic possessions. Note: The Vatican really does have courses to train priests in the ancient rite of exorcism.

After openly denying the existence of the devil in a class, Michael is sent to meet Father Lucas (Anthony Hopkins), a Welsh priest who regularly conducts exorcisms. On his first visit, Michael witnesses an exorcism involving a pregnant 16-year-old girl who was raped by her father. Despite experiencing first-hand the unusual behavior attributed to demonic possession, Michael refuses to believe anything supernatural is happening and instead insists that the girl is internalizing the trauma caused by her father.

Father Lucas warns Michael, “refusing to believe in the Devil will not protect you from him.”

Naturally, things begin to escalate after that first exorcism. Michael is tormented by a demon who seems intent on destroying him, and when Father Lucas becomes possessed he is forced to confront the same evil he has denied even exists.

Really, this movie has very little going for it. The story is predictable; the execution is … well, cheesy. I’m sorry, but what part of a red-eyed horse demon that just stares at you is scary?

The protagonist’s stubbornness is aggravating. His skepticism is understandable at first, but after seeing the girl vomit nails, and hear her tell him unknown details of his childhood, even the most stalwart skeptic would say, "Holy sh*t! Maybe I'm wrong." But, not Michael. His die-hard skepticism makes his epiphany at the end of the film hard to swallow.

Another shortcoming is the movie's abuse of special effects. For about the first hour, the film is very atmospheric -- using a nice balance of shadows and light to create tension. Unfortunately, as the possessions get worse, special effects bombard the screen and the creepy atmosphere is destroyed and replaced by a movie that feels more like a slasher flick than a supernatural thriller.

The movie’s ultimate failure, though, is not having faith in its villain. The devil should be scary enough considering his sole purpose is to torment mankind and destroy our souls. Instead of relying on that mythology, the filmmakers turned the devil into a villain who uses cheap parlor tricks and clichéd horror movie devices to scare the audience.

The only glimmer of light in this otherwise dismal film is Anthony Hopkins. He truly is a master of his craft. There are few actors alive who can convey an entire range of emotions with just a twitch of his eye. His understate subtlety is the only thing that makes the movie watchable.

Unfortunately, not even Anthony Hopkins can save The Rite from itself. The devil couldn't've made it any worse.

4 of 10 - Bad

How I Met Your Mother - "Last Words" Review

SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't seen the previous episode, "Bad News," don't read this review. Unless someone's already told you about the huge plot event that happened at the end of the episode.

"Last Words" continues HIMYM's sidestep into serious territory as the gang travel to St. Cloud to help Marshall deal with his father's death. Everyone comes up with a job: Lily decides to help Marshall's mom, Judy, any way possible; Robin is "Vice Girl" -- basically, she has anything Marshall might need to help him grieve, including alcohol, cigarettes, and "Crocodile Dundee 3" --; and Ted and Barney decide to make Marshall laugh by showing him YouTube videos of guys getting hit in the nuts.

I had some high hopes for this episode because HIMYM has never delved into such a dramatic subject before -- even Ted getting left at the altar pales in comparison to a death in the family -- and I thought it was a bold move for the series. I have to say, I was a little disappointed. It was still a good episode, but it could've been better.

The main story revolved around the decision for everyone in the Eriksen family to share the last words Marvin said to them before he died. Marshall is disappointed because everyone else had ideal last words, but he got, "Rent 'Crocodile Dundee 3.'" He spends the episode trying to remember something better and ultimately finds a butt-dial voicemail from his father the day he died. After five minutes of pocket rubbing, Marvin realizes he called Marshall, picks up the phone, and tells Marshall he loves him.

It's a nice, emotional ending, but the rest of the episode is just kind of ... eh.

Aside from Robin, the rest of the gang didn't have much to do beside stand around and look dumb. Ted and Barney were ridiculously juvenile whenever they showed one of the videos they found -- Marshall even yells at them at one point --, and Lily's way of helping Marshall's mom was making her freak out because that made her eat and sleep, which she hadn't done since Marvin's death. .

A side-plot that sprang up and disappeared involved an old bully, Trey Platt, from Marshall's high school days. Trey is the son of the reverend who is supposed to perform Marvin's funeral but has to leave because his daughter goes into labor in Chicago. Marshall is upset that Trey is performing the funeral, and Trey is a downright douchebag to everyone in the family, but then walks out of the shot and isn't seen again.

It really felt like the writers were trying to get a lot accomplished in this episode, but 22 minutes just wasn't enough time.

Despite its shortcomings, this episode had a lot of good moments. When Marshall hears his dad's voice at the end of the voicemail and it was hard to fight that urge while watching it. And, Robin was hilarious as "Vice Girl" who kept hooking up the other funeral attendees with booze, etc.

"Last Words" did an excellent job of setting up some major story arcs for the rest of the season. Naturally, Marshall is going to take some time to grieve and I think the show can benefit from the seriousness. And, after the funeral, Barney calls his mom and tells her that he's ready to meet his dad.

Like I said, I thought this episode could've been better. But, I'm really excited to see where things go from here.

Rating
8 (of 10): Excellent - A great episode with some minor flaws.

"Dinner for Schmucks" Review

Despite an all-star cast led by Steve Carrell, Paul Rudd and Zach Galifianakis, and direction by Jay Roach (“Meet the Parents”), “Dinner for Schmucks” fails to provide more than a handful of laughs.

As the movie opens, Tim (Rudd) is vying for a promotion at Fender Financial. After impressing his boss during a meeting Tim is invited to a “dinner for winners”—an annual contest during which each employee brings an “extraordinary individual” (a.k.a. idiot), and the person who brings the biggest idiot wins.

Things start to pick up when Tim hits Barry (Carrell) with his car. As it turns out, Barry uses dead mice to recreate artistic masterpieces (mousterpieces), and Tim immediately recognizes Barry’s winning potential and invites him to the dinner. What follows is a predictable series of misadventures that begin when Barry shows up a night early for the dinner.

First, Barry invites Tim’s stalker over to the apartment, then tells his girlfriend, Jill, that Tim is having an affair. Barry and Tim spend the rest of the night and next morning trying unsuccessfully to fix Tim’s relationship and secure his promotion. Unfortunately, we spend almost an hour and a half waiting for the dinner to begin. Until then, we’re reminded time and again that Barry is an idiot and Tim is a jerk.

After Barry wins the competition, Tim finally realizes that people shouldn’t make fun of each other for being eccentric and reveals the contest to the other “extraordinary individuals.” Though the dinner sequence is hilarious, it utilizes the same kind of over-the-top ridiculousness Roach used in "Meet the Parents" and leaves me wondering if Roach has anything new to offer.

Even the performances are completely one-dimensional. Carrell’s Barry is just an exaggerated version of Carrell’s Michael Scott from “The Office.” Rudd’s Tim is an unsympathetic jerk who is nearly impossible to care about as a protagonist.

The only redeeming quality of the entire movie is Jemaine Clement (“Flight of the Conchords”), who plays Kieran, an eccentric artist with an obsession for goats and his own likeness.

On the surface this movie has all the components of a comedic gem, but it doesn’t live up to its potential. The truth is that last year’s break-out hit “The Hangover” raised the bar for summer comedies. Instead of clearing it, Schmucks runs head-first into that bar. Over and over and over.

Rating
2 (of 10): Painful - This is giving me a migraine. 

Golden Globes 2011

The 68th annual Golden Globe Awards were last night, and the Hollywood Foreign Press awarded prizes to the best in motion pictures and television from 2010. Well, sort of.

Let me say this: I pretty much lost all respect for the Golden Globes last year when "Avatar" won for Best Picture and James Cameron for Best Director. Are you kidding me? Since when does box-office take determine what constitutes a good movie? Apparently, the HFP are easily swayed by dollar signs.

Last night, however, they seemed to be in line with the rest of the critics. "The Social Network" took home prizes in three of the five big categories: Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Screenplay. Colin Firth took home the globe for "The King's Speech," and Natalie Portman was honored for her brilliant performance in "The Black Swan" -- no surprises there.

Whereas last year I actually threw things at the TV when "Avatar" won, there weren't too many big upsets, just a few mild annoyances:

1) What is with people complaining that Ricky Gervais was too cruel with his jokes? I know, I know, celebrities are people too, but since when does that mean that they aren't allowed to be made fun of? I thought Ricky was hilarious -- and honest -- as he roasted the celebrities in the room. I'm sorry, Tim Allen, but what have you done? Robert Downey Jr. talks openly about his past addictions, but it's not okay for someone else to do it? Lighten up, Hollywood. Lighten up.

2) "Toy Story 3" is the Best Animated Film? I'm going to go ahead and assume that the HFP members didn't actually see the other movies nominated in that category -- otherwise, I have absolutely no explanation for how it beat "How to Train Your Dragon" or "The Illusionist." Both of them were heads-and-shoulders above "Toy Story 3."

3) I'm sorry, "Glee," but no. You are not the best comedy on television. Period.

It'll be exciting to see how things play out at the SAG and Academy Awards now that the Golden Globes have spoken. With any luck the right films will win -- and I'll be able to convince someone to bet some money against me. Wish me luck.